As Thanksgiving approaches, practicing gratitude can sometimes feel easier said than done.

Life does not stop being difficult simply because the calendar tells us it is time to be thankful. Families may be dealing with stress, disappointment, changes at school or work, strained relationships, or challenges they never expected.

So, it may take a little nerve to tell someone who is having a difficult year to focus on gratitude.

But I’m going to anyway.

Not because gratitude makes our problems disappear. Instead, practicing gratitude can help us notice the good things that still exist alongside the difficult ones.

What Is Gratitude?

Gratitude is more than simply saying “thank you.”

It involves recognizing something positive in our lives and taking a moment to appreciate it. That might mean appreciating another person, an experience, an opportunity, or something small that made the day a little better.

The practice does not have to be complicated.

Sometimes it is simply taking enough time to notice what we already have.

One of my childhood favorites, Mr. Rogers, said, “What we have is less important than what we make out of what we have.”

That idea is at the heart of practicing gratitude.

Why Is Practicing Gratitude Important?

Research in positive psychology has explored the relationship between gratitude and well-being.

Practicing gratitude has been associated with positive emotions, stronger social connections, and greater awareness of the things people value in their lives.

Dr. Laurie Santos, a psychology professor at Yale, explores many of these ideas in The Science of Well-Being. Her course examines habits and behaviors that can influence how people experience happiness and well-being.

The important part is that gratitude does not require us to pretend everything is perfect.

We can recognize that something is difficult while still appreciating the things that bring us joy, support, comfort, or connection.

Those two feelings can exist at the same time.

How Can You Practice Gratitude Every Day?

Finding gratitude does not require a major lifestyle change.

Small, intentional habits can make it easier to notice the positive parts of everyday life.

Try writing down a few things you are grateful for each day. They do not have to be profound. You might appreciate a conversation with a friend, a favorite meal, a helpful teacher, a quiet morning, or simply something that made you laugh.

You could also write a note to someone you appreciate and tell that person why you are thankful for them.

Another strategy is to think about something you have today that you once wished you had.

That happens to be one of my favorite ways to practice gratitude.

Remembering “The Tomato”

I used to drive a terrible red Volvo.

It was hideous. It was loud. It smelled terrible. And it was truly embarrassing.

Its name was The Tomato.

At the time, however, I was incredibly grateful for that car. Someone had generously given it to me during a period when I could not afford a vehicle of my own.

That did not stop me from dreaming about the day when I could drive something a little less conspicuous.

Years later, I developed a simple gratitude exercise.

Before leaving the house, I would sometimes imagine that The Tomato was waiting for me in the driveway.

Then I would walk outside and see my quiet, comfortable, wonderfully forgettable SUV.

Instant gratitude.

Nothing about my current car had changed. What changed was the perspective I brought to it.

Sometimes remembering what life was like before we had something can help us appreciate what has become ordinary.

Teaching Children to Practice Gratitude

Children can practice gratitude too.

The goal should not be to force children to feel thankful or tell them that they should not be upset because “other people have it worse.”

Instead, parents and educators can help children learn to recognize positive experiences alongside difficult ones.

Simple questions can help:

• What was something good that happened today?
• Who helped you today?
• What made you smile?
• What is something you are looking forward to?
• Is there someone you would like to thank?
• What is something you have now that you are glad to have?

These conversations can make gratitude more concrete and easier for children to understand.

They also create opportunities for families to talk, listen, and reflect together.

Gratitude Doesn’t Have to Ignore Difficult Feelings

Practicing gratitude does not mean ignoring frustration, sadness, disappointment, or stress.

A child can be disappointed about something that happened at school and still appreciate a friend who helped.

A parent can have an exhausting day and still be grateful for a quiet moment at home.

Both experiences can be real.

Making room for difficult emotions while also recognizing positive experiences can create a healthier and more realistic approach to gratitude.

Make Gratitude More Than a Thanksgiving Tradition

Thanksgiving gives us a natural opportunity to think about what we appreciate.

But gratitude does not have to disappear once the leftovers are gone.

One way to think about happiness is like a balloon with a slow leak. If we want it to keep floating, we have to keep adding a little air.

Gratitude can be one of those small refills.

A journal entry. A thank-you note. A conversation around the dinner table. A moment when you recognize that your boring SUV is actually pretty wonderful.

The practice does not need to be perfect.

It simply needs to happen often enough for us to notice the good things that might otherwise blend into everyday life.

This Thanksgiving, take a moment to appreciate something meaningful to you.

Then try doing it again tomorrow.